In this Wednesday Night Meditation, Rick Hanson offered a meditation and talk about Bringing Wisdom to Our Reactions to World Events.
The post Meditation + Talk: Bringing Wisdom to Our Reactions to World Events first appeared on Dr. Rick Hanson.
The post Meditation + Talk: Bringing Wisdom to Our Reactions to World Events appeared first on Dr. Rick Hanson.
In one of the most interesting conversations we’ve ever had on the Being Well Podcast, Forrest is joined by clinical psychologist Dr. Jacob Ham to explore what really helps people work with – and be with – trauma.
They begin with Dr. Ham’s background and what drew him to trauma work before Forrest asks him how he “conceptualizes” different kinds of traumatic experiences. Dr. Ham then takes them away from the conceptual, and toward the felt.
They talk about cultivating a felt sense of connection, empathy as a way in to relationship, and the value of anger. Dr. Ham shares about his own process taking risks as a clinician, using parts work, moving away from the “false idol” of cognizing, and finding a unique way in for each individual.
About our Guest: Dr. Jacob Ham is a clinical psychologist, Associate Clinical Professor of Psychiatry at Mount Sinai, and the Director of the Center for Complex Trauma. He was the therapist former podcast guest Stephanie Foo wrote about in her wonderful book What My Bones Know.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
LISTEN
WATCH
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
2:30: Jacob’s background
5:20: Cultivating a felt sense of connection vs. idolizing the concept of trauma
11:00: A monastic, medical, and artistic approach
13:00: Knowing our intentions, and feeling others’ pain as a therapist
18:00: Surrendering to overwhelming grief
23:50: Love, vulnerability, and authenticity
29:45: The value of anger, the energy it demands, and navigating it with humility
34:45: Presence, and taking risks as a clinician
40:40: How Jacob does parts work, and finding what works with each individual
46:15: Staring at the finger that’s pointing at the moon
49:25: Does a good therapist need to have experienced trauma?
52:30: Honoring our inner protectors, surrendering to pain, and knowing it won’t last forever
56:20: Shaping others’ ability to help you, and processing trauma without professional help
1:00:15: Tipping points and surrender
1:04:15: Recap
Support the Podcast
We’re now on Patreon! If you’d like to support the Being Well podcast, follow this link.
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Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
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Being Well Podcast: How to Become Self-Confident
We explore how we can improve our self-confidence, which helps us become psychologically flexible and create healthy boundaries with other people.
The post Being Well Podcast: How to Become Self-Confident first appeared on Dr. Rick Hanson.
The post Being Well Podcast: How to Become Self-Confident appeared first on Dr. Rick Hanson.
This Wednesday Night Meditation included a 34-minute meditation and a 47-minute talk from Rick’s series on Wise Effort, focusing on The Essence of Practice: Loving, Knowing, and Growing.
We can either be swept along, in ignorance, fueled and poisoned by hatred, greed, and heartache.
Or we can practice:
In our relationship to and how we respond to
what is happening to us
our experiences of that, and
the nature of reality itself
Practice is like a three-legged stool, with three key elements. In Pali: Metta. Sati. Bhavana. — loosely translated into English: Loving. Knowing. Growing.
I hope you find it helpful, and you are welcome to join my free Wednesday Meditations – which are open to everyone!
Meditation: The Essence of Practice – Loving, Knowing, and Growing
Let none deceive another,
or despise anyone anywhere,
or through anger or ill will wish for another to suffer.
Just as a mother would protect her child, her only child,
with her own life,
even so you should cultivate a boundless heart toward all beings.
You should cultivate kindness
toward the whole world with a boundless heart:
above, below, and all around,
unobstructed, without enmity or hate.
Whether standing, walking, sitting, or lying down,
as long as you are alert,
you should be resolved upon this mindfulness.
This is called a sublime abiding here and now.
There are those who do not realize
that one day we all must die.
But those who do realize this
settle their quarrels.
—Dhammapada 1.6
“As I am, so are others;
as others are, so am I.”
Having thus identified self and others,
harm no one nor have them harmed.
—Sutta Nipāta 3.710
Knowing that the other person is angry,
one who remains mindful and calm
acts for one’s own best interest
and for the other’s interest, too.
—Saṃyutta Nikāya 1.188
Original love is the ocean, it’s been there all along.
Finally, there is no difference anymore between us and it.
And that is a great great blessing.
—Henry Shukman
Do Freely
There’s a way to relate to the endless To Do list that’s freer and less burdened. When we “do freely” we refresh in having a sense of choice.
The post Do Freely first appeared on Dr. Rick Hanson.
The post Do Freely appeared first on Dr. Rick Hanson.
What can I do if my partner dominates conversations about our relationship? How can I navigate situations where I want to repair, but other people don’t? What’s a “highly sensitive person,” and how does it relate to conditions like complex PTSD, ADHD, and autism?
In this episode of the Being Well Podcast, Dr. Rick and Forrest open up the mailbag and answer questions from listeners.
If you’d like to have a question answered on the podcast, you can join us on Patreon or send it in to [email protected].
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
LISTEN
WATCH
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
2:00: What can I do when my partner dominates relationship conversations, but also complains about me “interrupting?”
12:45: How can you repair with family members…when they don’t want to repair?
22:55: Why do intrusive thoughts arise late at night? How can we address them?
28:00: I give to a fault in my relationships. What can I do?
34:10: How do you work with the tendency to be overly competitive?
40:45: What do you think about the Highly Sensitive Person (HSP) “diagnosis?” How does it relate to conditions like complex PTSD, ADHD, and autism?
55:15: Recap
Support the Podcast
We’re now on Patreon! If you’d like to support the Being Well podcast, follow this link.
Start speaking a new language in just 3 weeks with Babbel! Get 55% off at Babbel.com/BEING.
Zocdoc helps you find expert doctors and medical professionals that specialize in the care you need, and deliver the type of experience you want. Head to zocdoc.com/being and download the Zocdoc app for FREE.
Factor delivers fresh, never-frozen, fully prepared meals right to your door. Head to factormeals.com/beingwell50 and use code beingwell50 to get 50% off.
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription.
Finally get that project off the ground with Squarespace! Head to squarespace.com/beingwell for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch use coupon code BEINGWELL to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.
Connect with the show:
The post Being Well Podcast: Highly Sensitive People, Repairing with Family, and “Talking About Talking”: November Mailbag first appeared on Dr. Rick Hanson.
The post Being Well Podcast: Highly Sensitive People, Repairing with Family, and “Talking About Talking”: November Mailbag appeared first on Dr. Rick Hanson.
Being Well Podcast: Should You Become A Parent?
On today’s episode, Dr. Rick and Forrest focus on one of the most important decisions we’ll make in life: the choice to become a parent.
The post Being Well Podcast: Should You Become A Parent? first appeared on Dr. Rick Hanson.
The post Being Well Podcast: Should You Become A Parent? appeared first on Dr. Rick Hanson.
Just as we can exercise our arms or legs to build physical strength, we can exercise our brains like we do any other muscle. On this episode of the Being Well Podcast, Therapist Amy Morin joins Forrest to help us learn how to regulate our thoughts, manage our emotions, and become more psychologically flexible.
These key skills are particularly important for building a healthy relationship. Forrest and Amy explore how couples can work together to identify their issues, deal with effort imbalances, and avoid common mistakes (like having, get this, not enough conflict).
About our Guest: Amy Morin is a licensed clinical social worker, bestselling author, and the host of the Mentally Stronger podcast.Her most recent book is 13 Things Mentally Strong Couples Don’t Do, out on December 26th.
You can watch this episode on YouTube.
LISTEN
WATCH
Key Topics:
0:00: Introduction
1:35: Amy’s personal background, and how she got to the idea of mental strengths
7:30: Self-compassion vs. self-pity
11:05: Not giving away your power
14:50: Diagnosing root problems in relationships
18:25: When one frustration brings up all your other frustrations
22:25: The inevitability of conflict, and the vulnerability in expressing remorse
27:35: Setting the ground rules for a therapeutic conversation
31:05: When it feels like your partner isn’t invested in making changes
34:50: Learning to deconstruct reactive thoughts and misguided perceptions
38:30: Taking your thoughts with a grain of salt, and asking ‘what else might be true?’
41:20: Scorekeeping vs. negotiating, and finding ways to meet our own needs
45:40: Giving our partner what we actually want for ourselves
49:00: Balancing desires for closeness and distance
51:15: Not being a martyr or ‘controlling through giving’
55:30: Boundaries between partners, and how our backgrounds influence our preferences
1:00:35: Developing psychological flexibility
1:03:40: Recap
Support the Podcast
We’re now on Patreon! If you’d like to support the Being Well podcast, follow this link.
Start speaking a new language in just 3 weeks with Babbel! Get 55% off at Babbel.com/BEING.
Zocdoc helps you find expert doctors and medical professionals that specialize in the care you need, and deliver the type of experience you want. Head to zocdoc.com/being and download the Zocdoc app for FREE.
Factor delivers fresh, never-frozen, fully prepared meals right to your door. Head to factormeals.com/beingwell50 and use code beingwell50 to get 50% off.
Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!
Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription.
Finally get that project off the ground with Squarespace! Head to squarespace.com/beingwell for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch use coupon code BEINGWELL to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.
Connect with the show:
The post Being Well Podcast: What Healthy Couples DON’T Do with Dr. Amy Morin first appeared on Dr. Rick Hanson.
Meditation + Talk: The Power of Love in Turbulent Times
In this Wednesday Night Meditation, Rick Hanson offered a meditation and talk about The Power of Love in Turbulent Times.
The post Meditation + Talk: The Power of Love in Turbulent Times first appeared on Dr. Rick Hanson.
The post Meditation + Talk: The Power of Love in Turbulent Times appeared first on Dr. Rick Hanson.
This Wednesday Night Meditation included a 32-minute meditation and a 47-minute talk from Rick’s series on Wise Effort, focusing on Releasing Receiving.
One moonlit evening in 13th-century Japan, the Zen nun Mugai Nyodai was carrying water in an old bucket made of bamboo strips. It suddenly broke and she had an awakening. I particularly like this version of her enlightenment poem from the writer Mary Swigonski:
“With this and that I tried to keep the bucket together
and then the bottom fell out.
Where water does not collect
the moon does not dwell.”
I hope you find it helpful, and you are welcome to join my free Wednesday Meditations – which are open to everyone!
Meditation: Releasing and Receiving
Dāna offering:
(image) These teachings are offered freely, at no charge.
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